I moved back to college for the 3rd time in my life. I am Junior. And leaving never gets easier. I always think this time will be the time that I don’t cry/sob when it is time to say goodbye. Yeah not so much. Actually this time I had make up on and it ran down my face and now I have a stye on my eye. So maybe I am not so great at goodbyes?
This trip back to college was different than the other two. I took my car this year because me and my roomie are in a townhouse this year and we need a car. No more depending on the bus at 10pm when we just want a night out at the movies and IHOP. Or when we visit our favorite restaurant Macados for pretty epic spinach and artichoke dip + sandwiches + madison mud pie. And of course grocery shopping just became ten times easier. Well except for having a budget, that is new and something that I need to learn to get used to. Excited for the new opportunities!
Yup that is me and my Hokie Bird and hot red car ready for the drive to school solo. I was very much freaking out about driving the whole way on my own this year. But I was also excited and confident in my ability to do so. With GPS in hand, a car packed full, and a planned stop on the way to chill with my best friend and eat the lunch I packed I was ready.
And then it started to rain. No actually it started to pour. You know the kind of downpour you only seem to run into on a country back road in the middle of no where. Where the only place to pull over it either a stranger’s house or a tavern on the side of the road… Yeah. So I had to call my mommy. She and my roommate and my daddy all agreed that the weather was looking bad. So mom and dad to the rescue! They drove out to meet me (I was already a good hour into my drive) and planned to follow me as I drove to college. And of course the second they arrive the rain stops. I felt awful quite honestly! Here I was trying to grow up, move on my own, and I needed my parents help not even an hour in. And then the whole time they drove with me, there was no rain. They went with me up until I reached my best friend’s apartment and then left to turn around and go back home. Now the plan was to stay and eat lunch (that I had all packed) at my friend’s apartment but I needed to get on the road pretty quickly because I just wanted to get to school at this point. So I stopped, we hugged, and I got back on the road. Remember I said the rain had stopped? Not anymore! Yeah I drove the next 90 minutes in more downpour. But it wasn’t bad enough to pull over or slow me down so this time I handled it on my own. However the lunch I packed never got eaten (well it did but 3 days late….) 😦 But I did get to school and my apartment with plenty of time to chill with my roomie before getting all dolled up for an epic night out for dinner 😀 Sorry no pictures, we were too consumed with life and catching up to capture the moment.
I Realized 2 Major Things
- I am growing up. I am more adult than even 2 weeks ago. And I am 21 in about 2 weeks BUT when I am not comfortable it is OK to ask for help. Actually anyone should ask for help when they are confused or lost and in trouble. That is the only way we learn (well that and making mistakes). I am terrible at asking for help when I need it. I am just so self conscious. But everyday I am learning. There was nothing wrong with me calling my parents. Actually it would have been wrong to keep on driving and put my life in danger. That is the thing, when we don’t ask for help sometimes it is a life or death thing. So I am going to work on asking for help/advice whenever I need it. Sometimes, yes, I need to problem-solve for myself but when I have tried and tried again on something there is no shame in raising my hand, picking up a phone, or yelling into my roommate’s room (politely of course!) that I am confused and frustrated or I just need help!
- I am learning to go with the flow. I couldn’t eat my lunch on my car ride. A year ago I would have been silently freaking out. Thinking my ED will start to pop up. I will have to overcompensate at dinner. This is so wrong, what if I go down the wrong road again. Not this time! I made a decision that I wanted to get to my new home with time to unpack and chill with Kailey. I did not want to stop anymore. So I didn’t. I was normal. When people around me miss a meal they don’t freak out or overcompensate at dinner. I didn’t either. I got to my new home and Kailey and I got cute and went out to dinner. I listened to my body and ate until I was full and satisfied. I did not feel like I needed to eat more or less than I did. And the next day I had no inclination to skip lunch again (A thought that definitely would have occurred in the old days) It was a glorious feeling! So I am going to keep up with my efforts to go with the flow. If I forget my lunch one day (o wait I did that yesterday… told you I was going with the flow) I will buy something on campus (like I did yesterday) and my packed lunch will be there the next day. It feels a lot more free and I know the people I love appreciate my new endeavor to stop planning every moment of their lives and mine 😉
I hope everyone has a great day!
I am onto my 2nd day of classes and I have no expectation that things will go as planned. I don’t know what my posting will be like for the next week or so. I need to get in a groove. But be prepared for some epic back to school tales coming up in the near future!